A woman took to Reddit recently to find out if she was a jerk for sitting with her brother-in-law instead of cooking! This is the full story.
A Family Trip That Quickly Went Wrong
Veronica, a 29-year-old woman, recently went on a holiday with her husband, his parents, his sister, and her husband, Paul.
Veronica and her husband were going to another location the following week, but they tagged along with his family because a lot of their extended family lived in the country they were visiting.
Veronica doesn’t particularly get along with her husband’s family, but she still joined them on the trip.
They Were in the Same Boat
Veronica didn’t like Paul, because he was always trying to prove that he was a nice guy.
But there were times when Veronica found herself seeking out Paul for conversation at events.
They had some things in common, and the in-laws disliked both of them, so it was nice for Veronica to have someone in the same boat as her to talk to.
On this particular day, Veronica’s husband had gone to a business meeting, so Veronica stayed at the rental house.
A Friendly Conversation Starts a War
She saw Paul sitting by the pool and went to sit with him.
They were there for a few minutes when Veronica’s sister-in-law (SIL) came out and asked Veronica to come inside and make lunch with her and her mother-in-law (MIL).
They Both Wanted Her Away From Paul
Veronica declined the invitation, saying she wasn’t hungry and didn’t cook. SIL seemed annoyed and went back inside.
A few minutes later, MIL came out and asked Veronica to come to the kitchen. Veronica declined again and said she was fine where she was.
This Riled Them up Even More!
Later on, Veronica mentioned that she was going to get a drink, but Paul offered to get it for her instead. When he came back with the drink, he mentioned that SIL and MIL were upset with Veronica.
But Veronica brushed it off and went out to town for a while.
An Awkward Conversation to Walk in On
When Veronica returned to the rental house, she walked in on her in-laws telling her husband that she was treating them like “the help” and flirting with Paul!
Veronica denied the accusations, but her in-laws didn’t believe her. MIL insisted that Veronica’s husband should stick up for them.
Her Husband Stood up for Her
He defended his wife and told his parents to let it go. But the argument had already caused a rift, and Veronica’s in-laws were standoffish for the rest of the trip.
It’s a Family Tradition
Veronica felt bad because she thought future trips with her husband’s family were off the table.
She spoke to her mother about the incident, and her mother said that she understood where the in-laws were coming from, as some families expect women to cook and serve their husbands.
But Veronica’s mother also pointed out that Veronica wasn’t obligated to toss salad around just because she was a woman.
She Doesn’t Know if the Drama Was Her Fault
Veronica started to wonder if the drama was partly her fault. She reflected on the fact that she didn’t get along with her husband’s family, and that she had declined to make lunch with them.
But Veronica also knew that she wasn’t obligated to do something she didn’t want to do.
Veronica decided to talk to her husband about how she felt and to see if they could come up with a solution for future family trips.
Is She in the Wrong?
Was Veronica at fault in this situation? She was under no obligation to make lunch or to perform traditional gender roles.
However, she could have handled the situation better by being more tactful with her in-laws.
The rift that the argument caused could have been avoided if Veronica had declined the invitation to make lunch in a more polite manner.
She Wasn’t Even Hungry!
But she didn’t want to cook or even eat lunch, and her sister-in-law’s reaction to her declining was unwarranted.
And the in-laws’ accusation that she was flirting with Paul was baseless and unfair.
Her Husband Is a Gem
Her husband’s support in this situation was commendable, and Veronica should work with him to come up with a solution that works for both of them when it comes to future family trips.
The Internet Sided With Veronica
After sharing her story on Reddit, the responses were overwhelmingly in Veronica’s favor, with most people agreeing that she was not in the wrong.
Many people pointed out that Veronica was not obligated to cook if she wasn’t hungry, and that the expectation that women are always cooks is unfair.
Her In-Laws Had Escalated It
They said that SIL and MIL created all the drama when they lied and attacked her to her husband.
They also suggested that Veronica and her husband would be happier without being forced into a situation like this again.
Her Sister-In-Law Doesn’t Like Paul Hanging Out With Other Women
One commenter said that the drama was mostly about Paul, not making lunch.
The commenter pointed out that SIL might have had an issue with Veronica spending time with her husband – especially when he went into the house to get a drink for Veronica while she lounged by the pool and SIL was in the kitchen making lunch.
An Olive Branch
Another commenter suggested that if there was a next time, Veronica should suggest a ‘girl’s lunch’ at a restaurant, just for her and SIL, where SIL might appreciate a family member supporting her in being as equal in her marriage as Veronica is.
They’ve Got Work to Do, but It’ll Be Worth It!
Veronica’s relationship with her husband’s family seems strained, and this incident seems to be the latest in a long line of butting heads.
Hopefully, they can work through their issues with some time, but they’ll need an open and honest dialogue for that to work!
What do you think? Is Veronica in the wrong? Have you ever had a dispute with your in-laws?
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The post Her In-Laws Accused Her of Flirting With Her Brother-In-Law! first appeared on Career Step Up.
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Roman Samborskyi. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.