Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you felt taken advantage of but didn’t know how to speak up?
Jerry found himself in just such a situation when he was left to pay the bill for his girlfriend and her six friends at a restaurant. Let’s hear his story.
A Meal Out Turned Into a Nightmare
Jerry, a 34-year-old man, thought he was in for a pleasant evening when his girlfriend invited him to her friend’s birthday dinner at a Chinese banquet restaurant.
But things quickly took a turn for the worse.
She Knew the Score
His girlfriend instructed him to bring cash to split the bill with other guys at the table.
Jerry was okay with that until he got to the table assigned to him, his girlfriend, and six other girls, with no other guys around.
The other tables had plenty of guys mixed around, but Jerry was the only man at his table.
He Only Found This Out During the Dinner?
During the dinner, Jerry learned that each table gets a bill for the food served at their table, and the guys sitting at the table split it with other guys at that table.
But if it’s a table with only girls, the girls split the bill amongst themselves.
He Must Have Been Furious!
As the only guy at his table, Jerry got stuck with a $700 bill after tip!
The waiters walked up to Jerry with their card reader and shoved the bill in his face, leaving him feeling taken advantage of.
She Said It Was Cultural
Jerry’s girlfriend didn’t offer to help, and her friends thanked him and left him with the bill. Feeling displeased, Jerry shared his concerns with his girlfriend.
She told him that it’s how these types of banquet dinners work and that someone else’s boyfriend would pay for her in the future.
He Thought It Was a Scam
Jerry didn’t see paying it forward as a valid excuse, and he felt like it was a scam that his girlfriend and her friends pulled to get nice guys to pay.
She Admitted the Truth
While the cost of the dinner wasn’t a financial issue for Jerry, he worked hard for his money and felt like he had a gun to his head, forcing him to pay.
He felt like he had to pay to avoid looking cheap and embarrassing his girlfriend.
Jerry’s girlfriend admitted she would have felt embarrassed if he didn’t pay.
What Should He Have Done?
Jerry thought about different scenarios that would have been appropriate. Should her friends have offered to pay? Should his girlfriend have paid and split it with her friends?
Should he have only paid for himself and his girlfriend that night? Despite his discomfort, Jerry paid the bill, feeling like he had no other choice.
He took to Reddit to see if any of the community had some advice.
They Told Him How It Was
The advice given by Redditors was that the only person who should not pay was the person whose birthday it was.
They agreed that it was a bad and scammy thing to do, and that Jerry should not have been responsible for treating a whole bunch of girls he didn’t know.
This Would’ve Been a Sight
Some recommended that he should have paid his share, dumped his girlfriend in front of her friends, and walked out.
Others advised that he should have said something about the situation after paying.
Redditors believed that Jerry’s girlfriend played him hard and theorized that she might have planned it. She knew he would not complain.
Does She Owe Him?
To avoid a similar situation in the future, Redditors suggested that Jerry should pay his share and leave if someone gets pushy.
He should also tell his girlfriend that he expects her to reimburse him for her friends’ meals, because they are her friends, not his, and the responsibility falls on her.
They Think He’s Better off Without
But some felt that Jerry should dump his girlfriend. She essentially treated him like an ATM!
They also felt that Jerry got rolled by scammers and that the girlfriend might try it again later on.
He Needs to Set Some Boundaries
In retrospect, Jerry realized that he needed to set boundaries with his girlfriend and discuss how to handle similar situations in the future.
He didn’t want to be taken advantage of or feel obligated to pay for something he didn’t agree with.
He needed to have an open and honest conversation with his girlfriend about his expectations and values when it comes to money and relationships.
Communication Is the Bedrock to Any Good Relationship
Jerry’s experience taught him that communication is essential in any relationship. He learned that he needed to speak up for himself and his values and not let anyone take advantage of him.
He didn’t want to be in a relationship where he felt like he had to pay for everything or be taken advantage of.
He realized that relationships are about mutual respect and understanding, and it’s important to establish boundaries early on.
It Wasn’t a Fair Situation
The situation Jerry found himself in was an uncomfortable one.
It was not fair for him to pay for everyone’s meal, and his girlfriend should have spoken up and taken responsibility.
He Knows What He Should Do if It Happens Again
If it happens again, Jerry should be firm and assertive about what he is willing to pay for and communicate it to his girlfriend beforehand.
He should also not be afraid to stand up for himself and set boundaries.
Have you ever been in a situation where you felt taken advantage of or pressured to pay for someone else’s expenses?
What would you have done if you were in Jerry’s shoes?
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The post He Was Stuck With a $700 Dollar Restaurant Bill for His Girlfriend’s Friends and Forced to Pay It! Should He Have? first appeared on Career Step Up.
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Roman Samborskyi. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
Source: Reddit